Each year, thousands of high school graduates are the first in their families to go on to college.  Many of these “first-generation” students have overcome serious obstacles—social, academic, or financial—to get there.

Why do some first-generation and/or disadvantaged students do well in high school, preparing themselves for further education and training, while others do not?  We think there are two main factors.  First is the parents.  Teacher Richard Wright puts it this way:  “It’s not about money.  I don’t care how rich you are, if your parents don’t care about school, you won’t do well there.  On the other hand, your parents can be poor as church mice.  But if they value education, you have an excellent chance for success.”

The second factor?  Schools and educators dedicated to helping students succeed.   Some high schools go the extra mile to give their first-generation students a chance to live the American dream.  They are extraordinary schools for extraordinary students.

For some first-generation students, the transition to college is easy, with support from parents, siblings, and friends.   For others, it can be difficult, especially if parents are ambivalent about their teen’s quest for higher education.  Laura I. Rendon has written movingly of these difficulties.

What do you say to your mother when she wants you to work instead of continuing your schooling because she is tired of working the grueling night shift as a waitress…?  What do you say to your father when he refuses to assist you in financing your college education because you want to attend college far away from your hometown?  How do you communicate with your sisters, who now see you so differently that they feel awkward starting a conversation with you?  How do you grieve for the loss of a part of yourself….?   (“Life on the Border.”  About Campus, November-December 1996.)

Even parents who fully support their teen’s educational plans can be frightened and confused by the thought of their son or daughter going to college.  Here, culled from the literature on first-generation college goers, are some parents’ frequently asked questions and suggested responses.

Is my teen smart enough?   Many parents have unhappy memories of their own school experience.  As a result, they may lack confidence in their teen’s abilities, or think college is harder than it really is.  They should be reassured:  If their teen is academically prepared and works hard, he or she will do well in the classroom.  Parents should also know that colleges offer tutoring and other academic support.  Colleges want their students to succeed, and will help them do so.

Isn’t college just for the elite?  Not any more!   About one in three American adults has been to college.  College graduates include dentists, rock musicians, shoe store owners, movie stars, high school teachers, accountants, major league baseball players, forest rangers, soft drink distributors---all kinds of people, of all races, religions, and ethnic backgrounds.

I’m worried my teen will forget our traditions, become too Americanized.  Parents know that students return from college speaking differently, dressing differently, and with new ideas and political beliefs.  Sociologist Howard London says many parents fear they will lose their children, both geographically and culturally.  According to London, parents must trust the strong foundation they have built with their teen:  “There are many ways your daughter will continue to be a good daughter, but not going to college, or dropping out, should not be one of them!”

My son helps support our family.  We can’t get along without him.  It’s true college demands sacrifice, from students and parents alike.  But college graduates will, on average, be making a great deal more money in the near future than young people who stay home and work.  This added income will more than make up for a few lean years.

How can I make my home more conducive to study?  Teens need such basics as study time, time to attend classes, and a quiet study area with a chair and desk.

Most important of all, Why should my teen go to college?  Here are a few possible responses: 

And don’t forget:  College offers a better life not only for your children, but for their children in turn!

Copyright 2000 by ACT, Inc.  All rights reserved.  Reproduced with permission.

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